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My Christmas shopping is steeped in tradition. As each Christmas approaches, I observe a special custom without fail. Every year, on December 24th at about 4:31 pm, I begin my Christmas shopping.
What an exciting time it is, as I fill my Christmas shopping basket full of festive cheer and last minute gift desperation.
Jostling and roughhousing with the other men who have left their shopping to the last minutes before the shops close. Oh what a lovely festive atmosphere it is, as hordes of cantankerous, desperate men get together in department stores and share a merry friggin’ Christmas here, a “get out of my way” there - and perhaps even a celebratory poke in the eye, if that’s what it takes to secure a useless Christmas trinket or toy. Yes, sometimes two wrongs are only the beginning. As you can well imagine, purchasing Christmas gifts can become a full-contact sport.
Still, it is under these trying conditions that I usually select many wonderful, awe-inspiring, well thought out gifts for those that I love so dearly.
Let’s see, last year I selected Donny Osmond’s Christmas Collection for the kids, a “Cheeses of the World” assortment for my wife (imagine, someone went all around the world collecting cheese) and, a couple of matching tea mugs with naked elves dancing on the side (well, it looked like they were dancing) for Mom and Dad. And, of course, I scooped up a box of chocolate for my bum! I always buy my bum something for Christmas.
Never the less, as a married man with nearly a quarter century of delirious marital bliss under my belt, I’ve perfected Christmas shopping in 29 minutes or less. And so, I will try to help some of you lost men out there so that you might avoid some of the pitfalls of Christmas shopping. I will provide you with a few winner gift ideas sure to please the woman in your life. Yes, I will likely save your life. (You can thank me later).
Now I imagine some of you have already begun your shopping. A few of you have probably already completed your shopping (you wankers). But for the rest of us who live by the manly code, “never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid all together” - allow me to teach you “the way.” For I am a firm believer in the old adage, “give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a minute, but set that man on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.” But, as usual, I digress.
Yes, I write this for you men out there who have great difficulty selecting gifts. I imagine, as Christmas quickly approaches, many of you probably still don’t know what to buy her. Well, do you?
Of course not! Only God knows what she wants and even He isn’t completely sure. She changes her mind so often even a supreme being has trouble keeping up. So, what should you buy the love of your life?
First off, lets start with what the love of your friggin’ craptastic life doesn’t want.
I can guarantee that your woman does not want anything that requires vacuum bags. She also does not want anything that slices or dices. She does not want a perfume that’s called “Garden Fresh” or “Febreze” - even though Febreze does sort of sound French. You’ve probably already established that she doesn’t want anything that smells like you. If she did, she wouldn’t always buy you cologne. But like I always say to my wife, if you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
DO NOT buy your wife a toaster for Christmas. If you do, plan to leave town. “But honey, it’s a four slicer” will in no way repair the damage a gift toaster can do to a marital relationship.
In most states and provinces, giving you wife and toaster for Christmas is legal grounds for divorce. Still, Toaster Syndrome is very common this time of year. Many men, in an attempt to please the woman in their life, succumb to the ever-alluring draw of shiny kitchen appliances. This can lead to a Christmas disaster. If you don’t think things can get any worse, it’s probably because you lack sufficient information.
However, should you happen to make this unfortunate mistake, before this thing goes viral, remember, this gift selection must be quickly treated with expensive jewelry and a seriously healthy amount of groveling on Boxing Day. Fortunately, most women will agree that men are entitled to be stupid now and again - mind you, some of us do tend to abuse the privilege.
Now, if you want your love goddess to remain in your life, relatively free of hostility, here are some helpful tips when deciding what to buy her. If the gift you have in mind for her is dishwasher safe, has a non-stick surface or cool touch handles - your own handles, (if you catch my drift), will likely remain cool during the Christmas season!
If you want to continue living in blissful wedded harmony, her gift should be of the silk, satin, gold, silver and/or precious stone categories. And, if you merely want to remain a living, breathing person, it should not be made of polyester, vinyl, aluminum or anything with a Teflon coating.
So, to further drive home the point guys, A Non-Stick, Aluminum Reinforced, Plastic Cheese Tray With a Handy Polyester Carrying Bag… is a VERY, VERY BAD idea!
So, what does the woman in your life really want?
Well, your Venus in blue jeans probably wants you to buy her something that’s personal. Something that’s a reflection of how well you know her and how you feel about her. (GET HER JEWELRY BONEHEAD!)
Naturally, you’ll be tempted to buy your love goddess a stainless steel oven roaster, but resist the temptation and go for the jewelry counter.
When it comes to Christmas stockings, books, little tins of shortbread, music tapes or candy are nice. You may also want to give some token presents to her family, and this is an inexpensive way to do so. Remember, you do not want to offend her family at Christmas - wait until New Years for that.
But, most important of all, remember, you don’t necessarily have to give extremely expensive gifts to ensure a happy Christmas. If your relationship is based on material possessions and their value, it’s not a relationship - it’s an exercise in wealth re-distribution.
The main thing is men, you must reach inside and give of yourselves - but that doesn’t mean showing up empty handed, wearing nothing but a grin and a Santa hat.
Sometimes referred to as his “favorite album,” this perplexing but always fascinating album (technically his first “solo” album) came out briefly in 1967 on Capital Records in 4-track cartridge tape form. Zappa’s label at the time, MGM, threatened legal action and it was pulled. The 4-track cartridge system was an early competitor to the more successful 8-track tape format. According to Zappa himself, the Capitol 4-track of Lumpy Gravy is one of the rarest official Zappa releases - if not the rarest. Capitol had also begun preparation of the vinyl LP record as well as a 7″ single from the album (”Sink Trap” b/w “Gypsy Airs”) but these did not get past the test pressing stage.
The MGM/Verve version of the album was released on LP record and 4-track cartridge in May 1968 and later in an 8-track cartridge version also.
This review comes from issue #13 of Rolling Stone (June 22, 1968) by Jim Miller. This album, then as now, has always divided listeners.
I just read that Frank’s widow Gail said a 40-year anniversary deluxe edition is supposed to come out very soon…
Lumpy Gravy is the most curious album Frank Zappa has been involved in to date, and in many ways the music just doesn’t make it; as it says on the cover, “a curiously inconsistent piece which started out to be a ballet but probably didn’t make it.” The record was recorded in February of 1967, and Zappa conducts the “Abnuceals Emuukha Electric Symphony Orchestra and Chorus,” which is made of stray Mothers and some of Hollywood’s top studio musicians. On the back of the album we are asked by Zappa, “Is this phase 2 of We’re Only In It for the Money?” but Lumpy Gravy is hardly a sequel in quality or kind to Money, although it does share some thematic material with the later Mothers’ group.
Lumpy Gravy carries to an extreme the protean, fragmented musical approach that Zappa favors, but on the whole the work is rather inert. The composition is liberally garnished with dialogues about everything from living in drums to pigs with wings, but most of these spoken sections seem rather artificially forced. There are several jabs at surfing music, and the record closes with an instrumental version of “Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance” that could have been arranged by the Ventures. In contrast some sections of Lumpy Gravy are so extremely chromatic that they verge on “atonality;” these passages are usually scored for strings and/or woodwinds, although towards the end of the second side an atonal passage for wind instruments is incongruously accompanied by a studio drummer.
Parts of Lumpy Gravy break down into cliched lush string writing, while other parts abound in burps and bits of electronic music not unlike sections of “The Chrome Plated Megaphone of Destiny.”
Yet in spite of its varied tricks, Lumpy Gravy does not come to life; it is a strangely sterile recording, as though all the studio musicians reading their music could not do what a batch of well-rehearsed Mothers can do. Missing are the songs and the energy of the Mothers, with all their casually tossed off mistakes vocally and brilliance instrumentally; furthermore what Zappa has lost by not using the smaller Mothers he has not really gained back by using a huge orchestra. The texture of the music (and the scoring of the instruments, for that matter) is surprisingly conventional and even boring, especially if one is familiar with Zappa’s love of burps, aimless dialogue and certain kinds of electronic music.
Nevertheless Lumpy Gravy is an important album, if only because Frank Zappa is one of rock’s foremost minds. This album, recorded well over a year ago, demonstrates the problems that serious rock as a whole faces, as well as the compositional limitations (as of a year and a half ago) of one of serious rock’s leading voices. Lumpy Gravy can hardly be called successful, yet it points the way towards more integrated, formal protean compositions such as Zappa’s masterpiece We’re Only In It for the Money. It might be said that Zappa makes mistakes other rock composers would be proud to call their own best music; Lumpy Gravy is an idiosyncratic musical faux pas that is worth listening to for that reason alone.
Another very large group of gay activists (not the radical group “Bash Back” this time) assaulted a group of Christians who were doing some street evangelism in the Castro district in San Fancisco. Now I’ve seen the local gay community organize many protests and parades here in Florida, and they seem to think that nobody has any right to prevent their gathering and protesting/advocating. And then something like this happens…watch the video footage (NOTE: there is strong language in the video):
So this is the action from those advocating “tolerance”? The Christians here were definitely doing something risky, but they should not have been attacked for exercising the same right that the gays have been exercising excessively for quite a while now. I know there are people out there saying “well this isn’t how all the gays feel”, but I have a feeling that we’re going to be seeing this more and more frequently until something truly horrific happens (and considering the generally passive nature of many Christians, I’m fearing that a group of gay activists are going to either severely beat or kill a group of Christians). What kind of society is this, where people who stand for “tolerance” are rioting and attacking those who differ in opinion? It is clear that by “tolerance”, they really mean “agree with us or shut up”.
Here is the testimony of one of the Christians in the group (this can be found in the description of the video on YouTube):
“I went to the Castro (the homosexual district of San Francisco) like we usually do on Friday nights.
Normally, we sit on 18th and Castro, and someone plays the guitar, and we all worship God.
Sometimes a person will yell at us, or maybe a few. Sometimes people will ignore us. Sometimes people will let us pray with them.
This time was not a normal night. It was the first time we’d been back in the Castro to do our normal outreach since California Proposition 8, which defined marriage as “one man with one woman” was passed. We played the guitar and sang together and worshiped the Lord. After just singing and worshiping God for a while, Roger decided that we should all hold hands in a circle and continue singing. So we did.
Someone (Actually a person who came up and hugged and kissed some of us who he knew from the past) convinced some people that we were there to protest against the no on 8 campaign.
Then some guy who was dressed up like one of the sisters (The sisters of perpetual indulgence is a group of men who dress up like nuns and call themselves the spiritual authority of the Castro.) took a curtain-type thing (Which I think they use to curse people) and wrapped it around us.
Then a crowd started gathering. We began to sing “Amazing Grace”, and basically sang that song the whole night. (At some points we also sang “Nothing but the Blood of Jesus” and “Oh the Blood of Jesus”.) At first, they just shouted at us, using crude, rude, and foul language and calling us names like “haters” and “bigots”. Since it was a long night, I can’t even begin to remember all of the things that were shouted and/or chanted at us. Then, they started throwing hot coffee, soda and alcohol on us and spitting (and maybe even peeing) on us. Then, a group of guys surrounded us with whistles, and blasted them inches away from our ears continually. Then, they started getting violent and started shoving us. At one point a man tried to steal one of our Bibles. Chrisdene noticed, so she walked up to him and said “Hey, that’s not yours, can you please give it back?”. He responded by hitting her on the head with the Bible, shoving her to the ground, and kicking her. I called the cops, and when they got there, they pulled her out of the circle and asked her if she wanted to press charges. She said “No, tell him I forgive him.” Afterwards, she didn’t rejoin us in the circle, but she made friends with one of the people in the crowd, and really connected heart to heart. Roger got death threats. As the leader of our group, people looked him in the eyes and said “I am going to kill you.”, and they were serious. A cop heard one of them, and confronted him. (This part is kinda graphic, so you should skip the paragraph if you don’t want to be offended.) It wasn’t long before the violence turned to perversion. They were touching and grabbing me, and trying to shove things in my butt, and even trying to take off my pants - basically trying to molest me. I used one hand to hold my pants up, while I used the other arm to hold one of the girls. The guys huddled around all the girls, and protected them. Soon after, the cops came and stood between us and the mob. When it was getting more heated, the cops were like “You guys should leave.” and Roger said “We want to stay.” Someone tried to steal my backpack, but I tapped a cop on the shoulder, and said “Hey, that’s my bag.” and he got it from him and gave it to me. Others weren’t so lucky. Probably half our team got their jackets stolen. Eventually, as the crowd was getting more and more uncontrollable, the cops were afraid for our lives, so they escorted us to our van. (The cops were very nice to us from start to finish.) Our van was parked pretty far because it was hard to find parking that day. As the cops escorted us, the mob followed us, until the cops formed a line, and held off the people so we could drive away. We took the long way home, just in case anyone tried to follow us. When we got home, we prayed and sang more, and then prayed over each-other. Please know my heart. All of what we do is for the Love of Jesus Christ, and the love for those in the Castro. The Bible says to love God, and then love people. We can only love because He loved us first. We can’t hate the people because they are just broken and blinded by the spirit of this age. Our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against Principalities and Powers. It’s not a political thing, we just love the people. This is the raw footage of the walk from 18th and Castro Street to our car. It was only the very tail end of the night and says that we were all about prop8… when in reality we had nothing to do with prop 8 this night.:”
And here is a comment that I think sums up the hatred of Christians fairly well:
“im not gay but man i ****ing hate christians…ive been to christian school and you ****ers are the reason the world is collapsing on itself.**** you christians…way to have an open mind…do society a favor and ****ing DIEEEEE.” (censoring mine)
Isn’t it amazing that the Christians are hated so ferociously? The scary thing is, the comment above sounds what a nazi probably sounded like when refering to the Jews…and that is why I fear that the gay activists will get more militant and continue these attacks until Christians start getting killed. I’m hoping that things chill out before it gets to that point, but things are happening very quickly. Furthermore, Christians are steadfast in their conviction (in general) and faith, and the gay community is also firmly rooted in their beliefs…and since Christians typically avoid attacking other people physically, it is only obvious to assume that the gay activists (who clearly have no hesitancy in using force against law-abiding citizens) will eventually attack any Christians who would have the audacity to question their lifestyle.
I pray that I never have to deal with a situation like this.
As distinct from Perth domestic airport, which is another story entirely.
So for a start, the international terminal in Perth (Australia, not Scotland), is not really anywhere near the domestic terminal. It’s about another 15 minute drive from there. Getting a taxi to the international terminal from the centre of town will cost roughly AU$40 if you don’t hit traffic, about AU$55 if you hit peak hour traffic.
The good? Uhhh…I’m struggling to think of anything nice to say really. Oh! Immigration queues and quarantine queues are relatively short! That is if you don’t land straight after the flights in from Bali and get stuck behind the 500 people who all brought back wood carvings that have to clear quarantine inspection.
The not so good? Where to start? Getting a taxi. You land at the airport after having travelled for the last 24+ hours. You’re jetlagged. You’re pissed off. You just want to get home and crash. So you go out to the taxi rank after clearing immigration and customs…Only to find there’s no taxis. Which is so totally useful when 3 full flights just landed. So then you spend the next 90 minutes waiting in a queue only to find your taxi driver doesn’t know where they’re going (despite the in car GPS). So you can’t even have a nap in the taxi since you’re having to give the driver directions. Though how the hell a taxi driver doesn’t know how to get to Subiaco from the airport is truly beyond me. And unless you’re going to the CBD, there’s no airport shuttles or anything. The taxi problem I suppose can largely be blamed on the taxi company. But the complete lack of alternative transport (train/shuttle buses/public transport/other) is really a problem that Perth Airport needs to address as a matter of urgency.
Then lets go with the airport lounges. I’m a Qantas FF who has Qantas Lounge access. It would be nice if the lounge had more extended opening hours rather than simply opening it 2 hours before the next Qantas (OneWorld) flight leaves. Honestly, I’d rather go over to the domestic terminal and use the lounge in there than use the one in the international terminal. It is pathetically sub-standard. This is a Qantas issue, but you would think that the airport would do something to get them to improve the situation.
Airport shopping? Almost non-existant. Pre-security screening there’s a few shops. Mostly Australiana, a few food outlets, a newsagent and a tacky costume jewellery shop. Post-security in the departure area? Woefully inadequate. Perth is in the strange situation that quite a few flights depart between midnight and 2am. Apparently most of the shops figure that they don’t need to open at this time of night. Despite flights leaving for Dubai, Hong Kong, Singapore…So seriously, be thankful to the shopping Gods if anything is open at that time of night other than the newsagent. The newsagent/bookstore is ok, if not understocked. It’s pretty small, so don’t expect much more than the current bestsellers and a few other popular titles. They sell magazines and the usual snacks.
The coffee shop is the only place in the departure area to get food (unless you have airline lounge access, but then see my rant above about the Qantas lounge). But be grateful if it’s open, or staffed. There is a mini Eagle Boys (pizza place, compare with Pizza Hut) next to the coffee shop, but in all the times I’ve been through Perth airport, I’ve never once seen it open or staffed. So I don’t know if it’s actually operating. Other than that there are no food places in the departure lounge.
There’s Australiana type shops that sell the usual tacky souveneirs. There’s a Rip Curl shop. There’s a jewellery shop that sells the usual tourist souveneirs like opals and such. There’s a duty free alcohol shop. There’s duty free electronics shop (which I might point out has a seriously limited range of stock). I wanted a spare battery for my DSLR, and lo and behold, they didn’t have any. Don’t rely on them having what you want unless you call them beforehand to make sure they have it. There’s duty free beauty stuff like perfume and makeup. Though I wouldn’t buy it in Perth to be honest. Buy it in Singapore. Even with the current exchange rate, you’ll still get a much better deal in Asia.
And there’s no luxury goods store! No Gucci! No Louis Vuitton! No Prada! No nothing! Ok, I realise that Perth isn’t a huge airport and couldn’t support standalone stores for all the usual suspects. But would it be too much trouble to have even one sort of luxury goods store that sold any of that kind of thing? That’s the kind of thing that people have some interest in buying duty free because of the sheer cost of it otherwise. But to have nothing?
Lets just say that Perth international airport is in a pretty sad state of affairs. It’s my understanding that they’re currently in the process of shifting the domestic terminal over to the international terminal. Maybe with the increased number of passengers going through the future combined airport, the whole situation will improve. But as it stands, I hate Perth international. It’s a pain in the ass to get to. It has sub-standard facilities. It’s a pain in the ass to get a taxi home. Right now I seriously struggle to say anything nice about it.
Given that my speciality is postmodernism, it probably doesn’t come as much of a surprise that I am drawn to retellings and reimaginings of classic stories. I read Gregory Maguire’s suberb Wizard of Oz interpretation Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West shortly after release, and while I skipped over the first sequel Son of a Witch, I picked up the series once more with the third installment, A Lion Among Men. Ostensibly about the Cowardly Lion - here named Brrr - the only honestly interesting major character that emerges from the novel is Maguire’s original character Yackle, a delightfully cracked “walking cadaver” (24) of an oracle who first made her appearance in Wicked. After imbuing the previously one-dimensional Wicked Witch of the West with genuine pathos, sympathy, and motivation, my expectations going into A Lion Among Men were ultimately disappointed in his depiction of Brrr.
Maguire’s prose is lofty and distinguished, flowing with a silky elegance uncommon to most contemporary literature. Unfortunately, the loveliness of his language is not enough to make up for the largely uninteresting portrayal of the titular feline. Given Brrr’s iconic timidity, Maguire was given plenty to work with in terms of characterization. What frustrates me the most is that the last two pages offer more potential to compellingly flesh out his role as a cognizant, self-aware lion living amongst humans than the entirety of his presence in the rest of the novel combined. Though Maguire grants him a detailed and generous backstory, Brrr lacks the depth of character expected from one who has faced so much adversity. His portrayal as a sophisticated, aloof socialite melds well with L. Frank Baum’s original intentions, but I found it flat and with little lustre. Much could have been done with this premise, but Maguire elects to play it safe rather than experiment with the same - and successful - risks he took with the far superior Wicked. Brrr sadly ends up resigned to an undeserved fate comprised of nothing but story with minimal substance to accompany it.
I would also recommend reading the previous two installments of the series prior to picking up A Lion Among Men. Having not read Son of a Witch, I found myself lacking in understanding of Oz and all the nuances of its sociopolitical structure. Events in previous novels certainly have an impact on the overall plot of the third novel - I admit I made a mistake thinking I could enter back into the series at any given point and still make sense of everything that transpires. Maguire can certainly spin a complicated and intriguing yarn into an intriguing and adventurous plot, which is probably his greatest strength alongside the fluidity and sensuality of the writing itself. Had his characterization of Brrr consisted of significantly more complexity and volume, Maguire could have easily penned a classic amongst revisionist fairy tales. Instead, A Lion Among Men stands as a forgettable sequel to one of the best examples of the genre.
Bibliographical Information
Maguire, Gregory. A Lion Among Men. Boston: William Morrow & Company, 2008.
Further Reading
As mentioned numerous times in the review, the original volume in Gregory Maguire’s return to Oz, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West stands on its own as a worthy, humanizing successor to L. Frank Baum’s essential allegorical fantasy The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. I would recommend reading the latter first, obviously, before moving on to Maguire’s interpretation. Both encompass imaginative casts engaged in considerable action and emotion, and wrapped up nicely in prose that piques interest and moves the stories along at an agreeable pace. Fans of revisionist or postmodernist interpretations of popular and classic childrens’ folk tales will greatly enjoy James Finn Garner’s cheeky and greatly enjoyable Politically Correct Fairy Tales series. Some snaps of dialogue and descriptions from Maguire’s books recall Garner’s satirical, mischevious commentary.
God blessed Abraham in every way. He blessed him with great herds of sheep and cattle, camels and donkeys; tents filled with treasures of silver and gold, and servants to take care of it all.
But it wasn’t all that stuff that made Abraham rich.
Abraham knew that everything he had was a blessing from God.
When Abraham woke up each morning, he remembered that God was with him, and that God loved him so much.
That’s what made Abraham truly rich.
What a blessing it is to know that God loves you!
But Abraham was getting old.
His son Isaac was getting older too. And so one day Abraham sent for his most trusted servant.
“Make an oath with me,” Abraham said to his servant, “Promise me that you will find a wife for my son Isaac. But you must not find her here. Promise me that you will go to the land where I was born and find a wife for my son Isaac there.”
But Abraham’s servant said, “What if she won’t come with me? Shall I take Isaac back to live with her there?”
“No,” Abraham said, “God brought me from my father’s house and gave me this land. God will send his angel to help you find a wife for Isaac from among our people, but you must not take my son Isaac back there.”
And so Abraham’s servant took ten camels and piled them high with treasures from Abraham’s house. When all was ready he took his men and set out for the land where Abraham was born.
It was getting towards evening when he came to the town of Nahor.
There was a well outside the town, and Abraham’s servant made his camels kneel there, beside the well.
Then he prayed, “God of my master Abraham, be kind to my master today! Help me find a wife for his son Isaac. Look, the daughters of the townspeople are coming to get water. I will ask one of them for a drink. If she says, ‘Please, drink, and I will water your camels too,’ then I will know that she is the one you have chosen.”
Before he had even finished praying, Rebekah came out to the well with a large clay jar on her shoulder. She was very beautiful.
Rebekah went down to the spring and filled her jar with water.
Abraham’s servant hurried to meet her. He said to her, “Please give me a little water from your jar.”
“Drink, my lord,” Rebekah said, and quickly she lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink.
And then she said, “I will draw water for your camels too.” So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough for all his camels. Abraham’s servant watched her without saying a word.
Was this the one God had chosen to be Isaac’s wife?
When the camels had finished drinking, Abraham’s servant asked, “Whose daughter are you? Please tell me, is there room in your father’s house for us to spend the night?”
Rebekah answered, “I am the daughter of Bethuel, the son of Nahor.” Nahor was Abraham’s brother! She was one of Abraham’s own people, just as Abraham had asked. “We have plenty of straw and fodder, as well as room for you to spend the night,” she said.
Abraham’s servant bowed down to the ground and worshiped the LORD. “Praise be to the LORD, the God of my master Abraham! He has smiled on my servant Abraham this day. He has guided me on my journey and led me to the house of my master’s relatives.”
And then he gave Rebekah heavy gold bracelets for her arms and a golden ring for her nose.
Rebekah ran back to her mother’s house.
When Rebekah’s brother Laban heard Rebekah’s story, and saw the gold ring and the golden bracelets, he ran out to the stranger at the well.
“Why are you waiting out here!” Laban said. “Come to my father’s house, you who are blessed by the Lord! I have prepared a place for you, and for your camels too.”
The camels were unloaded and straw was brought for them to eat. Laban brought water for Abraham’ servant and his men to wash their feet. And then he brought a delicious meal and set it before them.
“I cannot eat until I tell you why I am here.” Abraham’s servant said.
“Please, tell us,” Laban said.
Abraham’s servant told Laban and his family the whole story.
“Before I finished praying in my heart, Rebekah came out, with her jar on her shoulder. She gave me water to drink, just as I had prayed. So, please, tell me, is she the one for my master’s son Isaac?”
Rebekah’s father answered, “This is from the LORD! Here is my daughter; take her with you, and let her become the wife of your master’s son.”
When Abraham’s servant heard this, he bowed down to the ground before the LORD. Then he brought out more gold and silver jewelry and other costly gifts and gave them to Rebekah. And he gave treasures to her brother and to her mother also.
The next morning Rebekah’s father asked her, “Will you go with this man?”
“I will go,” she said.
And so they sent Rebekah on her way. They blessed her and said to her,
“Our sister, may you increase
to thousands upon thousands;
may your offspring possess
the gates of their enemies.”
One evening some time later, Isaac was out in the field meditating when he heard the sound of camels approaching.
He looked up. At that moment Rebekah also looked up, and their eyes met.
“Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?” Rebekah asked Abraham’s servant.
“He is my master,” the servant answered.
Isaac ran up to the travelers, and Abraham’s servant told him all that had happened.
Isaac took Rebekah by the hand, and soon after she became his wife.
God had brought the two together, and they loved each other deeply.
The President of The United States of America is a position that commands respect no matter which party you belong to. An issue now at the forefront of national politics calls for an important distinction to me made: The president of this country and the man who holds that title are two separate entities. While both the position and the man must always be shown respect, this does not preclude either from criticism.
Is it patriotic to criticize the president? Without a doubt. Not only is it acceptable to criticize the president, it is every citizen’s duty to act as a watchdog for the American way of life and to speak up when the executive branch takes action against those beliefs and ideals. Some find it difficult to justify voicing their criticisms because of the enormous respect they feel for the office of the president. While this reluctance to stand up is fueled by good intentions, we all know where that road leads.
Of course it is patriotic to criticize the president, in fact, it’s unpatriotic not to. The United States embraces democracy. When no one stands up, the government reigns down. When opposing beliefs go unspoken, the voice of government is louder than ever. When the people forget that the power to choose is theirs, the result is a scared country with no recourse against domination. The result is a dictatorship. Under these conditions, the reach of government swells and widens and eventually the people have no way of taming the beast. In-actions such as these are the catalysts for the growth and strengthening of communist regimes and totalitarian-type control.
Come Jan. 20, 2009, Barack Hussein Obama will officially become president. Popular or not, black or not, when he takes that oath he better understand what it means. Equality is the absence of color and he gets no pass for being the nations first black president. His color does not make him better nor ill equipped to lead this country. His mistakes must be known and he must be held accountable for all he does. He must be held to the highest standard of any and all Americans, as he will be our supreme representative to the world.
When Obama tries to shut down free speech through his support of the deliberately mistitled Fairness Doctrine, he must be harshly critiqued. If he succeeds, it will mean the death of talk radio. The liberals would love to see that media outlet go down in flames since it exists now as a predominantly conservative platform. Conservatives will then be forced to turn to the internet, though it may not survive much longer, as their sole truth source since prime-time news programming has been bought up by liberals and no longer embraces objectivity. For numerous reasons newspapers aren’t even trusted as viable information sources by most and especially by conservatives, contributing to the basis for their nickname, “the liberal media.”
When Obama begins building his Civilian National Security Force, he must be harshly critiqued. It’s not exactly clear just what his exact plans are concerning this thinly veiled plan to increase control, but anytime the public is turned into government enforcers it’s time to put your foot down . . . on the side of the people. Remember that the government exists to serve the people, not vice versa. This role reversal will not only destroy the nation city by city, home by home, it will further bankrupt an already tapped-out economy. Obama declared The Force will be funded equally to the military in the same speech he said we can no longer rely on our military to achieve national security objectives. Just what might those objectives be, Mr. Obama?
Always question your leaders. Question them without yield until you get answers. This is not an act of treason or disrespect, and this is especially not an act of racism as some may mistakenly assume when the questions are directed at Obama. This is an act of love for one’s country. It is a performance of patriotic and civic duty. It is an act of defense and protection to which every citizen is entitled and no leader immune. The public must stay aware of Obama’s ability to dangerously misuse his power. He has been elected to act as a spokesperson for the will of the people and we all must do what we can to ensure that everything he does while in office reflects that. This is no time for optimistic blind trust. While Obama is revered for having a force for good and change and so-called hope behind him, there are also many, many unanswered questions. In this case, what we don’t know might just hurt us.
I have looked at Obama's speech transcript. I have watched his speech a few times. Each time, I am touched by this fantastic orator. Let me reproduce the speech here, and let me look into my crystal ball of what would my imaginary government say to us if they won the election on the same day(which is in red).Please do not take this as the truth. The words in red are a figment of my imagination. ANY FORM OF RESEMBLANCE TO REAL LIFE IS STRICTLY,COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY COINCIDENTAL.
If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.
If there is anyone out there who still doubts that Sinkapore is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our only founder MMM Leh Kan Tew is still alive in our time; who still questions the power of our authoritarian democracy, tonight is your answer.
It’s the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.
It's the answer told by a few lines that stretched around schools in numbers this nation has been used to seeing; by people who waited for a short time because there weren't any queues,by lucky people who were awarded the chance to vote because their constituency faced a contest, many for the first and probably only time in their adult lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference. but they are wrong.
It’s the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled – Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.
It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, PBP and anti-PBP, Chinese, Indians, Malays, Eurasians, naturalised PRs, straight only, disabled and not disabled - Singaporeans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of GRCs: we are, and always will be, the Republic of Sinkapore
It’s the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.
It's the answer that led those who have been told by elders by so many to be cynical, apathetic because it will not earn any money, and fearful because of the many potential defamation lawsuits, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more towards the hope of a better day.
It’s been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.
It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, no change has come yet again and it will be another wait to those who cannot wait to take over my place and this government.
I just received a very gracious call from Senator McCain. He fought long and hard in this campaign, and he’s fought even longer and harder for the country he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him and Governor Palin for all they have achieved, and I look forward to working with them to renew this nation’s promise in the months ahead.
I just received a very gracious call from MP Cham Sei Tang and MP Law Tha Khang. They have fought hard in this short campaign, and even harder in the previous campaigns. They have endured sacrifices for us that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the services rendered by these people who can always win one or two seats, act as a little opposition and make life miserable for me, so that when I screw up, they can come in and take charge. We can deal with them.It's okay.But supposing you have a parliament with 10, 20 opposition members out of 80.Then instead of spending my time thinking of what is the right policy for Sinkapore,I have to spend all my time thinking of what is the right way to fix them, what is the right way to buy my own supporters over.Nevertheless I congratulate them for what they have achieved despite the carrots SMM Gah Cheok Tang dangled in front of them and I look forward to working with them when they submit their applications for more upgradings in their old wards in the months ahead.
I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on that train home to Delaware, the Vice President-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.
I want to thank my father in this journey, a great man who built this nation, campaigned from his heart, built up a truly successful Sinkapore with its extremely successful government and built up a successful family who counts Prime Ministers, heads of Government-linked Boards and Sinkapore's top neurosurgeon as their members. He made me who I am today, and made Sinkapore who she is today.
I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last sixteen years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation’s next First Lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both so much, and you have earned the new puppy that’s coming with us to the White House. And while she’s no longer with us, I know my grandmother is watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight, and know that my debt to them is beyond measure.
I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last twenty three years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation's current PMM's wife, Ha Chong. I have my children, I love you all so much and you have earned anything you want.
To my campaign manager David Plouffe, my chief strategist David Axelrod, and the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics – you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you’ve sacrificed to get it done.
But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to – it belongs to you.
But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to - it belongs to me.
I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn’t start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington – it began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston.
I was always the likeliest candidate for this office given my experience and qualifications. We started off with a huge war chest, the incumbent government on our side. Our campaign was not hatched in the streets of Orchard - it began in the dining room of my father's house.
It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give five dollars and ten dollars and twenty dollars to this cause. It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation’s apathy; who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep; from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on the doors of perfect strangers; from the millions of Americans who volunteered, and organized, and proved that more than two centuries later, a government of the people, by the people and for the people has not perished from this Earth. This is your victory.
It was built by the working class of Singaporeans, who dug into whatever little savings they still had left after CPF deductions to give a few cents here and there to this cause. It grew from strength from the missing youths who accepted and embraced the apathy of their generation and busy pursued the latest technology or fashion trends. They left their homes, not to attend our opponents' rallies but to visit the stores and spend on the best goods, Sinkaporean pragmatism at its best; from the old people who refused to buy into our opponents' messages and believed that only PBP could give them whatever they want and that PBP is the only party capable of anything in Singapore, and proved that many years later, a government of the government, by the government and for the government has not left the sunny shores of Sinkapore. This is my victory.
I know you didn’t do this just to win an election and I know you didn’t do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime – two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor’s bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.
I know you didn't vote for me just to win this election and I know you didn't do it for me, if you got to vote in the first place. You voted because the government gave cash bonuses directly into your banks, a Progress Package for everyone,lift upgradings in your neighbourhoods so that they don't turn into slums. For even as I celebrate tonight, I know the challenges tomorrow will bring are the greatest I have ever faced - how to raise ministerial salaries higher as wages from ordinary Sinkaporeans keep falling. Even as I stand here tonight, I know there are Sinkaporean males who are waking up in their army camps to risk their lives for me. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor’s bills, or save enough for university, but get out of my elite uncaring face.
The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America – I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you – we as a people will get there.
The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but Sinkapore – I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you – I will get there.
There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can’t solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it’s been done in America for two-hundred and twenty-one years – block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.
There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as Prime Mini Minister, and we know that government can’t and won't solve your problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges I face, depending on the issue. I will sue and bankrupt you when we disagree. Above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it’s been done in Sinkapore for forty three years – block by block, brick by brick, your calloused hand by your other calloused hand.
What began twenty-one months ago in the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek – it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you.
What began two weeks ago must not end on this tonight. This victory alone is not the change we seek – it is only the chance for me to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were, which is to keep ministerial salaries at current levels. It will happen, with or without you.
So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it’s that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers – in this country, we rise or fall as one nation; as one people.
So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where I resolve to pitch in and work harder and look after only myself. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it’s that we cannot be greedy and expect the government to bail us out when Lehman MiniBonds default and hundreds of millions are lost – in this country, we fall as one nation; .
Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House – a party founded on the values of self-reliance, individual liberty, and national unity. Those are values we all share, and while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, “We are not enemies, but friends…though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection.” And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn – I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your President too.
Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the People's Body Party to the Presidential Palace – a party founded on the values of unity of all races, action, purity and integrity. Those are values we all share, and while the PBP has won a great victory tonight as always, we do so with a measure of calculated arrogance and determination to fix the opponents that have held back our progress. And to those Sinkaporeans whose support I have yet to earn or never got a chance to vote – I may not have won your vote, but I don't care., I need your help in this difficult issue that I am facing, and I will be your Prime Minister, you don't have a choice. And if you did not get to vote, too bad. There's always next time. Let's move on.
And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world – our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those who would tear this world down – we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security – we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America’s beacon still burns as bright – tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope.
And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world – our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of authoritarian leadership is at hand. To those who would tear Sinkapore down or oppose me – I will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security – I support you, but stop disturbing me. And to all those who have wondered if Sinkapore’s beacon still burns as bright – tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms, not from the ideals of freedom for all, but from the scale of our wealth and the salaries of our Ministars.
For that is the true genius of America – that America can change. Our union can be perfected. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.
For that is the true genius of Sinkapore– that Sinkapore can never change. Our union cannot be perfected further when it is already perfect. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.
This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that’s on my mind tonight is about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She’s a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing – Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old. She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn’t vote for two reasons – because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin. And tonight, I think about all that she’s seen throughout her century in America – the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can’t, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can. At a time when women’s voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can. When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs and a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can. When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can. She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that “We Shall Overcome.” Yes we can. A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can.
This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that’s on my mind tonight is about how the opposition tried to make things difficult for me. We shall take action, yes we can.
America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves – if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?
Sinkapore, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more room for my salary to go up. So tonight, let us ask ourselves – if our children should live to see the next century; what change will they see? What progress will we have made?
This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time – to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth – that out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can’t, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people:
This is our chance to answer that call. This is my moment. This is my time – to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity for me; to reclaim the Sinkaporean Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth – that out of many, I am the only one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can’t, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of Sinkaporeans:
Yes We Can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.
Yes We Can't. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the Republic of Sinkapore.
